Counting down the days to Richmond and seeing family. Happy Hump Day All! Its going to be a great day. Why you may ask, because I said so. No matter what happens on any given day, you will get through it, and happiness is right on the other side.
Today is round two of physical therapy. Oh boy, they are going to hurt me like usual. Oh well, I will be better in the end.
OK, so here are a few things I have learned over the years about women (Settle down ladies, its all a joke, don't get your panties in a bunch... unless your into that type of thing). Here we go.... (Some of this is common knowledge, and may have been seen before on other sites).
1) The Do I look fat question is a trap. If we say yes, then we are in the doghouse for a long, long time. If we say no, you will continue to think you are fat, and call us liars. Honestly, most of us don't care. If you aren't happy with how you look, change it. As long as we find you at all attractive, and sex is there, we don't care. Twigs suck, and 300lbs woolly mammoths are gross.... Find your own happy median.
2) We don't care what you wear. Show some cleavage and any straight man will be happy. If we were fashion designers, we may care, but at the same time, we probably won't be straight.
3) All women are crazy in some right. The goal in every man, whether they tell you or not, is to find the one most sane. Men are too, but this is about women.
4) We all know women have the "look" to get what they want. We are starting to get used to it. Change it up from time to time. Crying also doesn't work for some guys. For me however, I'm a sucker for tears.
5) Tell us what you want. We don't like to guess. If you want to have sex, tell us. If you want to just be friends, tell us. If you want to be in a relationship, tell us. Trust me, we will let you know what is OK with us. No use in hiding feelings, people will most likely choose the opposite of what you want any ways.
6) If you ask what we think of your friend, be ready for an honest opinion, and if she's hot, be ready to be asked for a threesome.
7) Men get jealous. It happens. If you go out with 5 other girls and 5 other guys, and you didn't invite us, yes we are going to most likely think something is going on. By the way, this would not be considered a "girls night". How would you feel in the same situation? Yup, thought so....
8) Redneck women are the best ones. If we ask you to come fishing with us, we want you to. If we are going to go fishing with the guys, it means, we are going fishing with the guys. Don't read too much into it. At that point, don't read to much into anything, most of us are too dumb to think that much.
9) Don't ever ask if we want to have sex. The answer is always Yes. Had a bad day, yes we want it. Just got done fighting, yes we want it. You just got done at the gym, off work, etc... YES!!!!
10) If you can cook, and care for us, you are a keeper. It never gets old. I'm not saying that you need to have all the responsibility of keeping a house up, or have to be Mrs. Clean, or a happy housewife. I'm just saying that if you do this most guys are less likely to stray (I say most, because I myself, never cheat, but lets face it, some men are scum).
OK, OK, ladies don't go Feminist on me, I'm just having fun for the most part (I'll let you pick and choose what I'm serious about). Smile, every day you live you are one day closer till you die, and you never get any do-overs!
Have a great day all! Let the comments roll on this, I'm waiting!
Today is round two of physical therapy. Oh boy, they are going to hurt me like usual. Oh well, I will be better in the end.
OK, so here are a few things I have learned over the years about women (Settle down ladies, its all a joke, don't get your panties in a bunch... unless your into that type of thing). Here we go.... (Some of this is common knowledge, and may have been seen before on other sites).
1) The Do I look fat question is a trap. If we say yes, then we are in the doghouse for a long, long time. If we say no, you will continue to think you are fat, and call us liars. Honestly, most of us don't care. If you aren't happy with how you look, change it. As long as we find you at all attractive, and sex is there, we don't care. Twigs suck, and 300lbs woolly mammoths are gross.... Find your own happy median.
2) We don't care what you wear. Show some cleavage and any straight man will be happy. If we were fashion designers, we may care, but at the same time, we probably won't be straight.
3) All women are crazy in some right. The goal in every man, whether they tell you or not, is to find the one most sane. Men are too, but this is about women.
4) We all know women have the "look" to get what they want. We are starting to get used to it. Change it up from time to time. Crying also doesn't work for some guys. For me however, I'm a sucker for tears.
5) Tell us what you want. We don't like to guess. If you want to have sex, tell us. If you want to just be friends, tell us. If you want to be in a relationship, tell us. Trust me, we will let you know what is OK with us. No use in hiding feelings, people will most likely choose the opposite of what you want any ways.
6) If you ask what we think of your friend, be ready for an honest opinion, and if she's hot, be ready to be asked for a threesome.
7) Men get jealous. It happens. If you go out with 5 other girls and 5 other guys, and you didn't invite us, yes we are going to most likely think something is going on. By the way, this would not be considered a "girls night". How would you feel in the same situation? Yup, thought so....
8) Redneck women are the best ones. If we ask you to come fishing with us, we want you to. If we are going to go fishing with the guys, it means, we are going fishing with the guys. Don't read too much into it. At that point, don't read to much into anything, most of us are too dumb to think that much.
9) Don't ever ask if we want to have sex. The answer is always Yes. Had a bad day, yes we want it. Just got done fighting, yes we want it. You just got done at the gym, off work, etc... YES!!!!
10) If you can cook, and care for us, you are a keeper. It never gets old. I'm not saying that you need to have all the responsibility of keeping a house up, or have to be Mrs. Clean, or a happy housewife. I'm just saying that if you do this most guys are less likely to stray (I say most, because I myself, never cheat, but lets face it, some men are scum).
OK, OK, ladies don't go Feminist on me, I'm just having fun for the most part (I'll let you pick and choose what I'm serious about). Smile, every day you live you are one day closer till you die, and you never get any do-overs!
Have a great day all! Let the comments roll on this, I'm waiting!
Love it! :)
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